Keep ’em open
This whole blogosphere stuff is really something to behold, you know? I felt a pang of guilt the other day, remembering a time a few years back that I offended J with some snarky comment about a site he liked where people posted pictures of their computer/speaker/tv/etc. set ups and gave detailed explanations of such. It seemed so silly to me at the time. And despite apologizing in words, my heart still felt the same. I have a greater appreciation for that site, and it’s meaning for J, now. I mean, really, how different is that than me posting some picture of my goofy kids or a beautiful blossom on a tree? And, now that I’m invested in the lives of so many wonderful people out there-many of whom I’ve never met, I can’t imagine NOT having these connections. The people in our lives-whether we’ve know them for years or only read their words on a glowing screen-can inspire us. This week I will bring you some tales of inspiration I see around me. Some are happy, some really, really sad, but they all have something to teach us.
Here is my first:
I have this dear friend from college who is struggling, I mean really struggling, in her marriage. They have three young children and she has devoted herself to them to the point that she has lost her sense of self. She has little contact with other moms. I’m not certain if they even have an internet connection, as I’ve never received anything from her via the web. She feels isolated and lost-the reasons many fine blog writers began writing in the first place-and, sadly, her marriage is suffering because of it. I pray for her daily; for healing of her heart, for her dear husband who wants nothing but happiness for her, for strength for her to take action against the demons working in her life, for her children-may they see their mom value her needs and not ignore them. I wish that I could fix it all for her, but know that I cannot. This is something she must do for herself…it stands to be a defining moment in her life.
I vow to love and care for myself. Not for my children. Not for my husband. Not for my parents. For ME!
Depeche Mom 
April 15, 2009 at 11:05 am
Girl, I totally agree with you. My best friend is the same way as your friend–no sense of self. She never does anything for her own sanity, never goes anywhere alone, never buys herself new clothes, haircuts, makeup–nothing. Her mother in law gave her $500 as a gift to use on herself. I told her I would go with her one day to get her toes done and buy some new clothes, but instead, she spent the money on a power wheels jeep for her kids. I’m glad she loves her kids as much as she does, but there are other people and aspects in her life that she needs to take care of as well.
April 22, 2009 at 6:30 pm
Amen
May 19, 2009 at 1:56 am
Her dear friend is starting to find her self again. It is so wonderful to watch her on a daily basis smile again. Unfortunately, seeing her firsthand on a daily basis there is one person who is suffering inside due to her new means of finding happiness. He is still right there next to her supporting every decision she makes, even though she is breaking his heart. His only wish has always been to see her happy and as he talks with her every night he realizes she believes he can’t be there anymore as her husband, just her best friend.
Please if you read this and know who her dear friend is don’t contact her. She has no idea her husband has written this comment. He can be reached at the unpublished email address if possible (Depeche Mom, if you read this please contact him)
April 14th Dear friend’s husband